Tuesday, December 13, 2005
i just wanna say that letting go is definitely one of the best decisions you have chosen to make. words fail to express, though seeing your silhouette slip and fade away into the crowd was painful beyond belief and heartwrenching, you need to know that by letting go, you're taking yourself one step further to freedom. you don't have to hide or be tired anymore. you don't have to be so worn out by everything and feel so tied down and restrained. You can fly now.
You can find the real source of all your smiles and laughter.
Wherever you may be, no matter where you go, I'll be here watching, waiting and when that day comes when you finally find truth in your desired happiness, I'll be standing by the side applauding and cheering for you. And then, it would be my turn to slip and fade away into the distance.
Till then, with tears, my wish for you would be that you can give your heart to the one and to the One who truly deserves all of you.
You know, i explicitly told God: If You're willing to take me into Your arms again, seeing the absolute worst in me, and knowing all my flaws..I don't ask to be Your child. I don't ask to be held by You like how the father held his lost son in the Prodigal Son story You always remind me of. I don't even ask to be a servant in Your house. If only You would just give me a place in Your house, a doorkeeper or maybe the one who tends to the animals in the barn..That would be more than enough.
The amazing thing which i totally left out was that this God gave His life. For the world. For ME. Me! imagine that. and if He already gave His life so He could spend eternity with me, wouldn't he also be willing to forgive me and call me His child again. And at the last night, He just kept singing His love over me..over and over and over again.
My grace is sufficient. My love is enough.
Yes it is. It truly is. Your love is the compass of my heart. And i'm just swept away by the realisation that this is a Hero of second chances.
Come on, Angels are cheering you on. You're not alone in this. People see your struggles. But I'll fight this battle for you. If I went to the cross for you, would there be anything else I wouldn't do to chase your heart back?
Yes that's my Hero. the Hero who would believe i can make the right choice even when the world's given up on me. the Hero who, from start to finish, had never quit helping me up when i fell so far and so hard. And even when i ran so fast and long away from Him, this Hero came all the way to where i am just so i'd know that there are arms i can run into. I don't need to play hide-and-seek games with Him anymore. I don't have to walk with these chains no more.
And now i am convinced that truly, neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities nor powers, nor trials, nor peril nor sword nor things present nor things to come could ever keep me away from the love of God which is in Jesus, my Hero.
God, i'm back. Free. For all You've done.
penned.
12/13/2005 11:07:00 PM
